What does “Success” mean for Briyce?

Briyce is a voracious reader and avid thinker at heart - constantly learning from all the awesomeness of the universe.

When we use language, we often mean different things because of different life experiences and life stories.

Briyce  00:00

SUCCESS in a professional setting. Of course it means promotion, higher salary, but then life is not just about that, about the professional success. So personally, my own version of success is being able to earn good while still having a great relationship with family and friends and having nobody that I've stepped on just because I want to succeed. So for me, it's a balanced thing and and sometimes professional success is difficult to achieve if your own personal relationships are suffering. So it should be a balance for me of your family time, your family connection, and also your professional and your career goals. So they should be they should go hand in hand. That's why I like working from home, because I experienced about 15 years in the corporate setting. It was good also, because I learned a lot, it was my stepping stone to being... to learning a lot, on becoming an online marketer and all this, because this is new. The VA stuff was new. 10 years ago, we don't have the VAs, the online writers, but being able to work from home is better, because I can juggle my time with family and also the work. And then the pandemic came. So the work from home got very popular because the pandemic was not... we were not allowed to go out. Sounds like

Darryl Lim  02:02

Sounds like RELATIONSHIPS. They are very important to you.

Briyce  02:07

Yes.

Darryl Lim  02:09

Why is that so?

Briyce  02:11

Um, because it enables me to function better if the people close to me, we are connected with time, and you know, just having a meal together so that contributes to my success and to my work life balance in achieving my tasks or doing my goals, so I mean doing my tasks and projects. So that's why it's important to have a good relationship with the people that matters to me, so that it contributes to my success.

Darryl Lim  02:56

Ah. Do you have personal examples of that, where your personal relationships with maybe someone close to you has contributed to your success?

Briyce  03:08

My brother is one because we are just two in the family. I mean, two siblings. Every time he he's he has problems, and I will always, of course, because I'm the eldest, so I will try to solve so, I mean, help him solve it. So being having a good work, I mean, good job that pays well. That means I can help him with these challenges. But on the contrary to that, my mother is some kind of my frenemy. If my mother and I have a misunderstanding, it also affects my work, because I would, I would not be able to focus that much. And I would, you know, my my head will be, I hate my mom. It's like that. So, yeah, but now she understands better, because the first time she heard about work-from-home, because they come from traditional she's a public school teacher before, she's so retired now, and she thought that working there is just, you know, you just typing, or you're not really working there in the house and in front of my computer. So she thinks that she just can barge in and would say (but it's a good intention). She'll say, you haven't eaten yet. You haven't had lunch yet. And I told her, Mother, my time is different because I'm working EST sometimes, so don't bother me, or she wakes me up anytime she likes. So that's just small things. So that's how my relationship affects work. So, but if everything's smooth, everything is good with my personal connections, I observe that I'm more productive and I can, you know, focus more on my projects.

Darryl Lim  05:07

What do these relationship[s] give you?

Briyce  05:11

Satisfaction and inspiration? You know, because sometimes i i plan with my... I have four nieces and nephews, the kids I plan out a good weekend with them, we go to church, and then after that, we eat dinner or out in a restaurant. So when I envision that, oh, we're going to this place. So I need, I need to work harder on the weekdays so that we will have a reward. And currently, because I don't have kids, so they're the ones that inspire me so and sometimes they they would, you know, ask for some, some toys, some like that. So, yeah, they're, an inspiration.

Darryl Lim  06:02

Okay, so they are [an] inspiration, and in some sense, almost like, from what you're saying, they both support you and sometimes get in the way of work. But that said, you still need these relationship[s] to come together with your idea of career and success?

Briyce  06:23

Yes, yes, because we're a very traditional Filipino family. So Filipinos are very family-oriented, and we still... My mother... I'm not living with her right now, but my mother would always say, if you just come back to the house, live with me, you will have free food. You won't have to rent...just like that. But I said, No, Mum, I have to, you know, live independently because I'm I'm now 40 plus years and even my brother, because my brother is working in the city, but she always likes to encourage us to work near and live with her, because she's also alone.

Darryl Lim  07:06

I'm now curious, what does FAMILY mean for you?

Briyce  07:10

Family? Because, yeah, again, coming from a Filipino background, I mean, the culture is integrated into being a family. So it's a big, big deal for me. So...

Darryl Lim  07:26

What do you mean?

Briyce  07:27

And it's actually, I think because the Philippines is a third world country, and then, you know, all the challenges that we have, being [and] having nothing, but because of family, because we have a core group of supporters, it prevents us from going crazy. Because, compared to the US, because, yeah, I'm exposed to, you know, the Western clients, and I mean, the West, the Americans, and they have so much shootings. At first, I was shocked. Why are they...? Why they have like that? So I think it's because they don't have that support system, like the Filipinos. So despite of us having nothing most of the time, but we have each other. We just talk it out. We also have disagreements with family members and friends. But maybe, maybe it's a thing, because the people... the Western for us, they are very independent, so I think when they have a train of thought in their mind, they go crazy, or their mental state will... and then they shoot at people, right? It's disturbing that they're like that, but they're rich. They're a rich country, but for me, that's why a family is very... it's like our therapy, but in the West, they have therapists, right? They have to pay hourly for therapists. But here, we just met our neighbor there and at the road, at the side of the road, we chat, and we feel good because we're connected that way, even if we don't have any... that much material things. So family is really really a good support system. And also, I speak for other Filipinos, whenever there's death, because I come from a barangay, it's a province, it's a rural setting. So when somebody dies and, of course, if there's a funeral, there will be expenses, right? It's extraexpenses, especially if it's not planned. So all the neighbors, all our neighbors, would put up small amounts, even 500 pesos, 100 pesos, just to help with the expense of the funeral. So that's, that's one of the things that I like it here. Everybody would show their condolences, and sometimes they bring food from their house so that when they are in the wake, we can have food. So yeah, that's one of the support system here and I've experienced it. It's natural for us, and if the other neighbor or other family members [experience death in their family,] we go there because there's death, and we show our condolence by bringing something and helping in any way we can. So that's one of my personal experience. Yeah, that's how we are. And even if we have nothing actually. For example, one of the neighbors is a carpenter, so he will volunteer to prepare the... in the cemetery, prepare for the coffin to be... just like that... a service. So if they know that their service is needed, they will volunteer. So yeah, I've seen that personally.

Darryl Lim  11:22

So do you think that contributes a lot to who you are as a person?

Briyce  11:28

Yes, yes, I've been brought up. I've been brought up as "we should help others". My mother and father was like that, and my grandparents. But then, when we go to college, and when I work as a young professional, sometimes we get influenced by other people, right? Oh, you can be like this. You can actually lie and or, you know, back bite your workmate, just so you can be... you can be good, or you'll look better to your boss. So as, yeah, as I was working in the city, um, so you will learn a lot of negative things, so it will integrate to me. But as I went through my professional career, when I worked with workmates, with bosses, you know, and because it was ingrained inside my personality, by my parents, by my family, that [I should] avoid stepping on others, avoid hurting others, just so you can, you know you can take advantage of [them]. So that's inside me. I'm not saying just because we're having an interview, but sometimes it it's to my harm. It's to my disadvantage, because I would be very trusting, I would be very helpful. And most of the time, they would take advantage, and I would say, Oh, my God, that's what happened. I should have seen this coming. So sometimes it's also like that, because people in the city are more, you know, assertive, more aggressive. Yeah, that's the basic teaching that I have held on to also, so I can see that. I can say now, because of that, somehow I'm more balanced in a way.

Darryl Lim  13:40

I see. So it's almost like the kind of connections that you have... your personal relationships. They help you instill certain values in you that keep you grounded, even though, even as you go out there in the city to work and meet different people.

Briyce  13:55

Exactly, exactly. When I turned... when I spent about five years [there]. Oh, I was already, oh, not to trust too much, I mean, to protect myself... from others. But I was able to, you know, balance and keep [to my values]. Yeah, it kept me grounded until now.

At Split Arenas, we believe professional communication should be rooted in personal stories. When we look at the words people use, and the stories behind those words, we understand who they are, and we can build better relationships. To learn more about what we do, click here. If you wish to be featured in our Language Stories Series, reach out to darryl@split-arenas.com.